Saturday, November 12, 2011

Adieu, Adieu to you and you and you

You guys! I am once again leaving here.

I know, I know, I am such a blog hooker.

But to make any sort of notice and career and get my clearly awesome opinions circulating I have to go where the dream makers are.

You can now find me at emleahy.tumblr.com

Oh you know a different house don't mean different shoes mmmk?!

I have no idea what that phrase is supposed to mean.

But I loved my time here and I am excited to get into tumblr hopefully. maybe. not at all.

The sun has gone to bed and so must I,
Em

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

I'm Not Saying She's a Gold-digger...

But she ain't...telling her respective partner she's potentially pregnant.

Why? Why! WHY?!

Ok so I found myself maybe in this situation. I mean no, I have a friend who is in this situation. Aside the point... the point is...

Why is it women (and there are a lot of us) who are in the pregnancy scare situation keep it from the respective father?

So here are the reasons why I assume one does this and then my reasons why they are being idiots.

Reason #1: Because I don't know for sure.

Well ok first of all...get to knowin for sure. But I can't full heartedly back this up, because ladies, it is damn near impossible to buy a "uh-oh am I prego?" test without being completely humiliated. Like what do you buy with those?! As I went to purchase mine it's like... I also needed a pack of beer, but those don't go well, people are so judgey. And then it's like but I need some milk and eggs, but am I being too ironic? Well I can't buy it on it's own because that's too obvious. Well I could buy it with a bottle of real and fake champagne but there's no ring on my finger... Or I could put it with gift things and maybe someone will think I am buying it for someone who wants one of those tiny things? CONUNDRUM! But I totally spaced off. Point is... You need to know for sure, take a test, but also talk to your doc. And now... why you shouldn't keep it away from yo baby daddy... because why, Why, WHY, WHY?! should you have to wait and agonize and create absurd future plans in your head and be the one to worry while he goes off scott free? Hell to the no. That boy needs to be put in his place. Oh it feels better without a condom? Well awesome, by the way, here's the hell you put me through. Also, how would you feel if someone sprang news on you that "Hey I kind of had this feeling for a week or two while I was late..." I don't know. I think, tell him. Tell him that it is a worry and that you are going to find out and let him know. He may want to go with you. He may go halfsies on the preggy indicator (holla -- those things are kind of expensive because you never have this scare when you have money)

Reason #2 --- He has a new girlfriend

Hey what do you know, I know this situation too. Ok yes this is sticky because it's not that you want him anymore, in fact you are GLAD he found someone else because you were using him for sex and he was easy because he was in love with you... or maybe not, but hey that's just one perspective. Listen girl, it ain't easier either which way. You probably need to alert him so !) he doesn't make the same mistake with New Girl (shoutout to the show) and so that !!) he doesn't think he has long gone gotten over you, cause heyyyy you're around FOREVER. That was scary. What I am saying is, if he is mature enough to jump into a relationship that is THAT soon after you guys canoodled (ahem...I'd be suspicious here..yes this is because of personal experience) then he should be mature enough to know how to handle this situation. And it's really fair to lady #2 as well. She has a right to know if this is the situation she wants to be in. If so, awesome, if not, then he shoulda wrapped it. Just sayin.

Reason #3--- You aren't sure who the father is.

Ya I'd wait. Or pick the better candidate. That rhymed.

Reason #4 -- You're scared.

Well welcome to technology, texts are easy. Who gives a sh*t if they are impersonal and that's "not the way you break up with someone". F*ck it. It's the Twitter age. You can do what you want. Everyone's going to find out anyways. Plus I HATE confrontation.

I guess what I mean is, ladies: don't be afraid to make your man afraid. If you are racking your head over it, who says you should be alone? Remember -- try to find out as soon as possible, but if just isn't soon enough and you need someone, then what's the sense in not trying? Seriously... it COULD be a ride to the doctor. And then a ride to ice cream after. That could just be me, but I don't think I'm unique so it could be a lot of you.

And USE protection. But I'm not an idiot, life happens. Just be smart about your next move.

By the way I went with red bull and cheez its and a sweatshirt. I also chose the hippest cashier at 11PM. I didn't get judged at all. Not like Plan B. Those people are awful. I should have bought more tests just so I wouldn't have to endure it again. I mean... I should wait until I'm married so it will be good news instead of bad... yeah...that's it.

One line means...?,
Em

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Funkytown

I'm in a funk.

I don't know how to get out of it.

Well I do know, sort of.

I need hobbies. I need things to do.

But between work and school I am just too tired to do anything else.

But I really want to do something else.

So I need activities and hobbies I can do.

Things that don't require a lot of time. Or money.

Maybe I just want to do things like color.

Now I kind of want to color. I kind of want to sleep too. Sadly, sleep will win. It always does.

I also want to like get up early and enjoy the morning. Weird.

I wish I could go into a Panera and read and work on my writing and stuff without being disturbed. But everyone knows me... so it's hard. But I might just do it anyways.

Is this formatting weird? I think it's weird. I probably won't do it anymore. It's too breaky. That's a word.

Maybe I will try the guitar again. It's so pathetic how it just sits. Sometimes I feel like it stares at me with the saddest eyes in the entire world. I have completely neglected it. It's probably the same way my fish, Bennett looks at me. Except at least he has a name. My guitar is one of the few things I have no named. Now that makes me sound positively insane but whatevskis. I name things. A lot.

I guess I have a lot of pictures to upload. I could do that.

But I think I will just sleep on it.

Sleep wins. Always.

But I'll probably end up listening to Incubus because I forgot I used to kind of like them.

Scatterbrained,
Em

Monday, October 10, 2011

Top 4 Overplayed.

Why. why. WHY. are the top 4 most requested songs on radio stations the 4 most overplayed?

I mean, I get the obvious. But what I am saying is... why are you calling in and requesting songs that you will hear in no more than 2 minutes? By the time you get in on the radio station, guess what? They just played your song. But you didn't hear it, because you had the radio turned down. Because you have to when you are calling into the radio station. Congratulations. You're an idiot.

So I guess my issue is I want to hear the top 4 interesting requested songs. I want to hear some throwbacks people. I want them to be like "Alright these are our top 4 requested songs" and Sean Kingston's Fire Burning comes on. Yes, hell yes, who all called in to hear that song?! Epic. I liked that song as well, good choice.

I mean, I know when IIIII called in to request a song, (that is not infamous among my friends) it was not an overplayed song. It was popular yes, but still had few and far between plays. It was a once every 3-4 hours. Not a once an hour. But that was when there was a lot of music coming out.

I guess I have no real way to summarize this. I just really don't like hearing top 4, top 5 lists and then after they are done playing those... they play them again. Because they are in the loop. Ridiculousness.

Now that I reread my work, I bet those radio stations don't even track the most requested songs. They just get lazy and just play the most popular songs out because it seems the most logical. Well I'm just making things up at this point but just remember, requesting songs is because you DON'T get to hear them every hour.

I may just be bitter because I once got suckered into announcing one of those lists. When I called to request a song.

Ring-a-ling,
Em

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The Playboy Clubbed

Alright, so it comes as no surprise that I have been watching The Playboy Club faithfully. I have to admit I find the Playboy Bunny the epitome of classy sexuality. If ever I get my figure to where I want it to be I will one day be a Playboy Bunny for Halloween. Blame it on The Girls Next Door, but I just don't see anything wrong with it.

And now it comes to my attention that The Playboy Club has been canceled. And that it has been rallied against by parent groups and whatnot as being degrading and too sexual and women's rights blahdiddy blah blah blah.

Now...let me get this straight... the show is premised on girls who had nowhere to turn, who wanted to make something of their lives, get their start in the world. And that's....degrading....? How? Because they wear skimpy bunny suits? Because of the magazine? Even though anyone who knows their history... the bunny is far different from the playmate.

But it's ok for Pan Am* to be aired (with considerably shoddier writing) which basically implies the SAME lifestyle? But because they are wearing a stewardess uniform and therefore covering up more of their body it's ok? Isn't there some sort of saying regarding dressing up a mule in horseshoes but it's still a mule... ? And l mean like they totally have a great range of diversity in that show too just like The Playboy Club... oh...wait...nope. Just kidding.

Dear World,
I am confused.

So The Playboy Club is alas too provocative for primetime. But it's ok for the character Brittany on Glee* to wear that horrendously inappropriate short skirt? A show that's even more geared to the impressionable age group? Oh I'm sorry, it's ok because it isn't degrading... she was singing Beyonce's Girls, which is centered on girls running the world. So skimpy/slutty outfits are cleared when their backed by a powerful song. A skimpy sexy outfit has no place in a time where women were all around degraded. Nice hypocrisy, parent groups.

I guess all I want is the show back, because it was getting really good, and I really wanted to see it through. So if a cable network would like to pick that up... that would be aces.

I'm Bunny,
Em



* These shows have redeeming qualities too, but for comparison sake I singled them out. I actually watch both of these as well.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Short and Sweet

This, kiddos, will be short and sweet.

Because I've had a bit to drink.

Because typing and spelling correctly is hard.

The people who hate reality television... are people who can't admit the life they live.

Jersey Shore, Real World, don't deny it... these people exist in your life. The only difference is, their versions have been condensed to fit a season. These people carry it out your entire friendship. Think about it. I could elaborate if you want me to. And I will win.

MTV knows,
Em

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Make Me Lose My Breath

So I am sitting here watching It's Complicated with Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin. And I am watching it because I really love Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin, and because I was told by many people how hilarious it is.

And it is. I am laughing.

However, that being said, the character Jane Adler always seem to be out of breath. Like I don't kknow if it's because she's under a lot of stress, or excitement, or if there is a breathing issue. But everyone knows I have breathing issues, like if I see someone take a deep breath, I have to take a deep breath and sometimes I have to take deep breaths to make sure I still can... I digress.

The point is... I just don't know how to handle characters that are always out of breath. I feel like I have anxiety. You just want to shout "STOP. BREATHE. Now go..."


In other news, I teared up during the season finale of Awkward. Talk about your awkward... I feel completely embarrassed by that.


Take a deep breath and count to 10,
Em